Lament For Lost Books Lost On Purpose

If I forget to read
between the lines of the butterfly crumbling pages
in the dust-laden corners

faintly may the violets of future springs
reprimand; the baby stars leave off
shining in the land of ploughed under kingdoms

if I refuse the gleam of the wild apple borders
of the suddenly untold told intertwined with gold, with silver,
cerise, elaborate devices,

stories rich and strange that should not cease
oh do not cease to know

knowing that they are mine to know,
but, if so,
may the lute strings in the attics hidden

break my heart

far far is the world from bliss, contemptuous
of this, of these faded valentines with the clasped hands
the pale blue ribbons streaming

from the mouths of doves
then may the small birds fly away
from the rainbow running rills

and may no one till from this anymore
the least of spent languages,
the currencies of dreams.

mary angela douglas 12 march 2015

She Dreams Of His Death

[to Fanny Brawne and to John Keats...]

it's in the garden or it's in my heart,

his nightingale singing in the mulberry tree;

the orchards beyond remembrance now.

the universe was rich with petals;

the heart is filled with snows.

it's in the garden or its in my heart.

am I the one that knows?

am I the one with the lifted lamp

using light like a knife?

the uncrowned Queen of all this vanishing.

I vanish too but they won't hold me guiltless.

it's in the garden or it's in my heart

my love my love my love

mary angela douglas 2 february 2015

Did I Arrive Too Early In My Apple Green

maybe I should have regretted

almost treading on your shadow;

removing one charm from the bracelet of the sun:

the one shaped like a treble clef?

the tiny piano with the hinged lid?

these were my crimes

the winds never whispered through the lilies.

the fir trees.

there was a meeting somewhere.

did I arrive too early in my apple green

confounding the centuries

and steeples with their glitter snow.

it comes down when you shake it.

I should know.

mary angela douglas 28 january 2015