We Are No One's Toy Soldiers Anymore

we are no one's toy soldiers anymore

I said to the troops inside my mind

who had started to assemble once more

on the parade grounds

from now on it is Christmas time forever

Christmas leave and we are free

and we are no one's toy soldiers anymore.

I repeated, because they did not stir. or acknowledge me.

I thought they would explode with joy

throw scarlet caps into the air with golden tassels.

the troops in my mind, but they were so used

to assembling there they remained

in perfect formation never looking at the clouds.

shall I blow a trumpet into their ears

my companions of the years

my thoughts who have kept me company

and ranged themselves with a will.

they may as well be phantoms so little

they heeded me

and I was at a loss what to do now that

they could not desist from marching

though marching orders were gone 

and marching on and on

never looking at the marsh where the wild birds rose

and the moss, so velvet green and the under grass

where the shadows of peace unseen

covered all their futile maneuvering

where the long shadows lulled me to sleep.

mary angela douglas 29 september 2020