DAY OUT REMEMBERED/MONOLOGUE ON CEZANNE (FINAL VERSION)

 

I said there is a lemon wind in a painting by Cezanne

also an azure one, they are crosscurrents in the same wind actually,

I feel that this is so in the darkening of May

a storm is on the way so we took our umbrellas

and I continued,

but going at different speeds on different tracks

you said (I think), I can't pinpoint your disease

it's time you were heading back...

so I walked a little way farther on

and said to myself

I will sing to myself by myself about the painting of Cezanne

about the azure, then the lemon wind

I will find my way to the yellow house behind the trees

with a scarlet roof dappled. a blue green mountain daubed

farther off

as if on a Chinese tapestry, the mountain I mean and in a dream with its requisite laurel

and you will never come to hear my heartfelt lectures on art and 

the artist

ill at ease who wanted to live in a yellow house with an azure

breeze you dubbed me

and the trees far off when you see them in the painting even when

you are as close as you can be so close you think you may fly off into

the lemon wind

and there at least God will listen to you.

I mean, to me.

mary angela douglas 3 december 2021;28 march 2023