WHO ARE YOU, WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN (FINAL VERSION)

 

who are you, what have you been

I heard the clotted clouds and canvases demand,

the finagling skies

thinking I was the bride of politeness

and little else, besides

then I reached to the other side

boarding house reached

and found the darkened silver backing

of the mirror, blurred into multiple mirrors

while I cried, so homesick then.

what a carnival barker's ride

nothing was what it seemed when gleaming

from afar and I thought, Alice, how foolish you are

what unpleasant tea cozies

and all the doors ajar

only gossip, at teatimes

all about me and the Mad Hatter.

it really doesn't matter, when it's a lie but

how I wished not to have gone to sleep

on that summer riverbank when well,

to have stayed awake would have been

so much more pleasant a berried picnic

but I was always that way

prone to fantastic mistakes

bossed around by all the red queens

in my simple blue dress

I do confess I found it trying,

I was so happy to see the unpainted roses

on arriving  back home and escaping the Musts;

my mother so beautiful, with little tea cakes,

raspberry jam and butter

and no crusts.

mary angela douglas 17 march 2023;18 march 2023