for Ilya and Emilia Kabakov
in memoriam, Ilya Kabakov (September 30, 1933-May 27, 2023)
taken this way, sorrow is almost Atlantis, Kitezh rising
from a dreamy lake disguised in children's daydreams
rising from the roofs like wounded swans imperial
when shall I rise when shall I paint old dawns
as if there were angels thronging to meet us
on the other side of all the museum pieces
until they are more than bearable
filled with the silver point of what I imagined to be true
that invisible cities resided behind old baseboards
of the bittersweet afternoons of the glorious installations
of our love
that we were citizens
of the heavenly country beyond the trivialities
and that we would not falter, even turned to dust.
forgive me dear that now as a ghost of the former Long Island,
Soviet Union, Venice draped in negligible purple
I can no longer eat the golden pears of summer
that I have drawn for you now
upon the rickety table, among things familiar
to us both.
mary angela douglas 26 june 2023;30 june 2023
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